“Vegetarians, and their Hezbollah-like splinter faction, the vegans, are a persistent irritant to any chef worth a damn. To me, life without veal stock, pork fat, sausage, organ meat, demi-glace, or even stinky cheese is a life not worth living. Vegetarians are the enemy of everything good and decent in the human spirit, and an affront to all I stand for, the pure enjoyment of food. The body, these waterheads imagine, is a temple that should not be polluted by animal protein. It’s healthier, they insist, though every vegetarian waiter I’ve worked with is brought down by any rumor of a cold. Oh, I’ll accommodate them, I’ll rummage around for something to feed them, for a ‘vegetarian plate’, if called on to do so. Fourteen dollars for a few slices of grilled eggplant and zucchini suits my food cost fine.”
- Anthony Bourdain, Kitchen Confidential
Allow me to welcome you to the Hair of the Hog. I am Dr. Teeth and here is launched our culinary journey into the food and drink that defines the Genesee Valley of Upstate New York. No, not New York City which is quickly becoming food and restaurant Mecca, but the city’s bastard half-brother Upstate whose vast agricultural offerings offer variety and quality rivaling any public market in NYC.
Nonetheless, the majority of restaurants and eateries in our region suck donkey balls. Thus begins my quest to identify the jewels of the Genesee Valley’s gourmet crown and cast aspersions upon those that are lackluster with a scorn and guile only possessed by a “food writer.”
I can dish it out, but can I dish it out? Well, yes. My culinary career started meagerly enough as summer jobs on the lines at various area golf courses which led to a private catering company in Livingston County. I drew enough attention there to secure a Head Chef’s position at a now defunct restaurant in the Lower Mill building in Honeoye Falls. When I arrived the establishment was buying everything prepackaged from the neighborhood grocery store. I refocused the menu to draw on local, organic products purchased from area markets but the owners use of takings for her personal checking account took us under in six months.
From there I went and cooked for the blue-haired ladies at the Genesee Valley Club. A steady gig to be sure but Betty and Erma were rarely adventurous with their pallates and had no real concern for what their meal ate before it arrived on their plate.
Back out on my own I went doing mainly pig roasts and bbqs, crafting my own line of rubs and sauces. About two weeks ago, as I stood at some fundraiser drinking a Leinenkugel’s Red and watching the slow billow of applewood smoke rising from my smoker, a gentleman approached me and explained his fondness for my brew of choice.
The conversation progressed, we discussed the underlying flavors of Leine’s new seasonal, and the gentleman introduced himself as Colonel Rusty Shackleford, II. The good Colonel is editor-in-chief of a rather widely read local political blog, The Water Buffalo Press, which at times has minimally covered food and brew festivals. His intent has been to expand regional cuisine coverage within his own site but he and his co-blogger have been busy enough with full-time jobs and their own respective coverage areas.
I voiced my own desire to establish a site where I could both write about the food I love and hawck some of my own wares. The rest is now history I suppose and the end result of the conversation is the Hair of the Hog.
